More about testing: How well do your children get along?PaleoMD
More about testing: How well do your children get along?
The Federal Constitutional Court confirmed this in a published decision. The "existing legal-social family" would then have priority in the best interests of the child, declared the Karlsruhe judges to justify it (Az: 1 BvR 1154/10).
Lover claims to be a biological father
In the event of a dispute, a woman from Saxony had an extramarital relationship that has now ended. During this affair she had a daughter. The former lover claims to be their biological father. With his lawsuit, he wanted to dispute the legal paternity of the mother’s husband. The courts rejected this.
No right to paternity – but right of access
With his constitutional complaint, the former lover asserted that there always had to be an individual examination. In his case, the family peace with the mother is not endangered if he gets legal paternity for the girl. But the Federal Constitutional Court also dismissed him. The basic rights of men would not be violated. However, he has a right of access if he has already established a relationship with the child – which was apparently the case here.
As a justification, the Karlsruhe judges referred to a decision of principle from 2003. In it the Federal Constitutional Court had given biological fathers the possibility, which at that time was still excluded by law, to contest paternity recognized by another man. However, there is no entitlement to paternity if the child is integrated into the mother’s family.
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Kate Winslet is one of the most elegant women in the world, but she is grappling with problems that many mothers know. The actress and mother of three revealed on a talk show that she has often suffered from incontinence since the birth of her children.
During an appearance on the UK’s Graham Norton Show, Winslet spoke about her "small accidents" happen, for example when she sneezes or hops on the trampoline. "It’s awful, especially when I’m wearing a skirt." However, she also has the necessary composure to accept these mishaps as part of her life with children.
Many women should be happy that the sensitive issue of incontinence after pregnancy and childbirth is being publicly addressed. It is by no means rare. Obstetricians and gynecologists assume that around 20 percent of all mothers suffer from incontinence.
The pelvic floor is weakened
The reason for the loss of control of the bladder is the weakened pelvic floor. Pregnancy and childbirth have stretched the tissue and made it looser, the support function declines, and the bladder closure mechanism loses its strength.
To get rid of the problem, women should contact their gynecologist. Specific pelvic floor exercises can help, but must be done regularly. Correct lifting, breathing and avoiding incorrect postures should also be considered.
If nothing helps, there is always the option of an operation in which, for example, a band is worked in below the urethra, which allows the tissue to be tightened, prevents it from sagging under load and thus puts an end to the annoying dripping.
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The eldest child is slowly moving closer to moving out of the parental household. But instead of looking forward to the upcoming time of rest, the wish for another child determines the parents’ thoughts. "Such a straggler is a real gift for couples. You get another chance to feel your strength and to feel young again" says Cornelia von Schelling, author of the educational guide "Set boundaries for children".
Babysitting instead of a disco
With a straggler child, a completely new situation arises – especially for the big sister or big brother. A crying baby can quickly change the everyday life of a sibling. In addition to school, training and personal life planning, completely new tasks suddenly arise. So the next disco visit has to be omitted in favor of evening babysitting. So it is not surprising that in many cases the older children have little enthusiasm for their parents’ desire to have children again.
Siblings take responsibility
"It is important to talk to the older children about what it will be like when the baby arrives" says social worker Joachim Armbrust, who is himself the father of a straggler child. If the children are prepared for the new circumstances at an early stage in discussions with their parents, the siblings will often quickly feel a certain anticipation. It is important to let the children decide to support their parents themselves. Often the older siblings are happy to take on responsibility for the youngest family member. In no case should the willingness to help of the almost adult children be overused.
Contact with people of the same age is important
The upbringing of the late children themselves is also a special challenge. Parents are usually less strict with their latecomer children, because in old age one sees much more easily and no longer has the energy as a few years ago. In order to prevent the siblings from complaining, Armbrust advises them to admit these things openly. Latecomer children will always have an unequal relationship with their older siblings. Not infrequently they are not taken seriously by them. To compensate for this, parents should ensure that their latecomer children have a lot of contact with their peers outside of kindergarten and school, as von Schelling explains.
No longer sure of absolute love
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The child who has long been number one no longer enjoys the unbroken attention of their parents. He is no longer sure of the absolute love of the parents because there is another child who is loved by the parents. You will not be able to spare him these feelings, because of course the fact is that babies not only tie up the time and affection of their parents, but are simply annoying when they cry too often.
This is how you make the start-up easier for the big ones
Include your child in baby care if they want. Let them watch the changing or pass the cream. Maybe it will change its own doll or teddy bear while you are busy with the newborns? But never make the child feel responsible for the little one. It is and remains a small child who can help if it wants to. It is also helpful if the dad or grandparents have time to deal with the older child in the early stages. Especially in this phase, the firstborn needs exclusive time for itself and with it the security that I am loved just why are indian women so hot as much as before. When friends or relatives make their first visit, they should always greet the older child in detail first. Maybe they’ll also get a little something for free? Let his sibling introduce him to the visit.
When the children pacify or wet them again
Often children show what is known as regressive behavior after the birth of their sibling. They start pacifying again, suddenly wet again at night, crave for the breast or otherwise show behavior that is typical of babies. Try to stay calm – these reactions are perfectly normal and usually go away quickly. Scolding doesn’t help, on the contrary, it will make your child’s behavior worse.
Jealousy and pride
Of course, aggressive behavior or attacks towards the baby must be prevented. Try to stay calm anyway, because threats and harsh punishments often only reinforce the underlying jealousy and thus the behavior. With all the emotional chaos that your child feels at the beginning. When they realize that they are just as important to their parents as they were before, they usually add a healthy dose of pride very quickly.
The 53-year-old American Cindy Reutzel gave birth to her own grandchild as a surrogate mother – because her daughter had to have her uterus removed after suffering from cancer. "She does what she has done for me all her life" says daughter Emily Jordan. "To make sure that I am doing the best I can."
Grandmother gives birth to her own grandchildren
Photo series with 7 pictures
Cancer diagnosis in pregnancy
It’s been two years since Emily Jordan was diagnosed with cervical cancer. But shortly before the 29-year-old’s doctors were about to remove the uterus, they discovered that the young woman was pregnant. The situation could hardly have been more difficult. After all, it was a question of saving the life of Emily Jordan or that of her unborn child. Together with her husband Mike Jordan, she decided to have the operation, which meant the loss of the baby and ruined the chance of ever having children of their own.
An agonizing decision
"I can’t describe how it felt when they found out I had cancer, that the chance of ever having a baby is lost" says Emily Jordan looking back, obviously struggling for words. The memories of the day two years ago when they made the agonizing decision are too painful. Because with the operation, of all things, the organ in which a baby would mature would be removed.
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Emily’s mother didn’t have to think twice
But more than two years later, Emily and Mike Jordan realized that their dream of becoming parents was by no means as hopeless as it was once thought. Although the way there was a rather unusual one. Because in the end it was Emily Jordan’s mother, Cindy Reutzel, who gave birth to her own grandchild – with the support of modern medicine. After all, artificial insemination has been available for more than 30 years. What was originally intended for women between the ages of 20 and 40 has gradually become an option for women going through the menopause to allow themselves to have their own child after all.
"What if I have your baby?"
For Cindy Reutzel, the matter was therefore immediately clear when they learned from the doctors that they could keep Emily’s ovaries intact. "What if I have your baby?" suggested the now 53-year-old.
At first, Emily and Mike Jordan didn’t really take their mother’s suggestion seriously. "We didn’t think that was a realistic alternative" says Emily Jordon, who works in hospital administration herself.